Zen Driving


I have recently taken a very Zen approach to driving and I am feeling great, my anger is dissipating slowly and I feel better during the day.

First rule of Zen driving: be alert and think of other road users before thinking of your self, which means: put other people’s safety first, certainly before your ego and before getting to your destination on time.

Second rule of Zen driving: be aware of your inner volcano. We are all human and most of us are stressed most of the time. Make sure your pressure cooker does not blow its steam valve while you are driving. Recognize your anger, remember your responsibility towards other road users, let your anger slowly leak out of you, let go of your desire for vengeance, think kindly on others, breath deeply, hold for an instant and then release. Repeat this ten times or so. At the end you will find you've actually forgot what you were angry about.

Third rule of Zen driving: be focused, avoid all distractions. Included among the top ten distractions are: using your mobile phone while driving, smoking while driving, and getting a blow job while driving.

Fourth rule of Zen driving: follow all the rules of the road and ignore all honking drivers urging you to break them. This includes driving at or just under the speed limit while staying to the extreme right to allow speeders to overtake you. Ignore any ‘vehicular posterior attachments’ (VPAs) in the form of irate drivers trying to let you know you are driving too slowly. Stop at all red lights even if the road is clear, this means stopping at the white line before the pedestrian crossing, not on top of it or after it. Again ignore all drivers urging you to cross the red light.

Fifth rule of Zen driving: calm your mind, think before you act. I personally tend to listen to music that I like which keeps me in a serene mood, classical mostly, operas and oratorios. Handel’s Messiah is a good one to listen to. Music has a way of elevating words and we tend to take in and adopt the values behind the words more readily. Little wonder then that most if not all Church services use music and singing to convey messages of faith to the congregation.

I try to give myself ample time to get to where I am going, or if I am late, I call ahead to let my date know I will be late.

Speeding, even if it does not end in a tragic crash, does not get you to your destination any faster than driving at the legal speed limit. It only feels that you are getting there faster. The difference is tens of seconds, maybe half a minute, no more. We all drive on the same roads and we all have our wheels firmly planted on the asphalt, we are all at the mercy of the road's turns and roundabouts, its crossings and red lights. If you move at a certain time to get to a certain destination via a certain route under normal traffic conditions it will probably take you a fixed amount of time to get there no matter how fast you go.

So whenever you feel bullied and battered on the road, take a deep breath and be as serene and unmoved as a mountain, Ya jabal ma yhizak reeh and remember, no offense you get on the road is worth loosing your calm mood and serenity.

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